Montecito Bay Whispers

 

I recently had a few words with MoffettMephit (aka "The Moff") of Montecito Bay. The community's number one resident told me they've been doing well, the twice a week parties and the shopping at the shops and gaming at the arcade going well. But there have been some stories not all is well under the surface. Most notable are tales of some mad scientist.

"I hear there's a lizard scientist working on teleportation technology.," Moff told me, "And this scientist intends to unleash it upon Montecito Bay!" I inquired about him and his plans, and Moff answered, "His name is hard to pronounce because it's all numbers, planting things in places that'll take you to other places. It's all very unsettling." I then asked which places. Moff answered that all he knew was "to the places that people want to go. Sounds pretty sketchy to me. But really, things have been quiet around here. I mean, unless you wanna get really weird." I asked if such weirdness included a time-traveling Delorean. Moff grinned, "There's already one 'round here, really."

So exactly what kind of teleporter will this supposed mad lizard scientist unleash? Time will tell.

Bixyl Shuftan

 

 

Reader Submitted: "Elf Equality" Protest

 *

"Having toured and scoured the Fantasy Community Center I have detected a glaring lack of a statue to our beloved Rillifane, Leaf Lord and primary Deity to Wood Elves, and many Fae, faeries, humans and lovers of the wildes.  This blatant slap in the face can nae stand unanswered. Tis bad enough we must endure taunting from Sun Elves about our natural ways,  They call us simpletons and ignorant.  And they say we are nae fit to sleep with pigs but I assure ye we are.   I stand at an appropriate location to correct this injustice, and urge an exploratory board be formed, a committee convened, a clutch clatched to resolve this injustice forthwith, fifthwith even.  I submit this with a resounding,  Hmmmph!" 

Tealcie Annibles 

Editors Note: The "protest" was in the name of fun.
 

Interview With Rudolph

 

After being on medical leave, Penny Shuftan is back with an article. Recently, she happened to meet one of the best known of Santa's reindeer: Rudolph. No longer the young little guy in the classic claymation tale, he's all grown up. But he's still got a shiny red nose, and still pulling Santa's sleigh. So what else has he been doing? Penny had a few questions.
 
Read Penny's article in Extra.
 

Bomb Diffused At The Newser Office

While reporting the news has always had it's share of critics, seldom do things with telling Second Life news stories result in violence. So it was a surprise when Rebel Wolf (HermitBlue Resident) of the Deathlands informed yours truly that a bomb had been placed at the Newser office in HV Community.

The bomb itself was a metal canister that was small enough to be carried by one strong man, and had a nuclear symbol and a countdown clock. While we could simply toss it into the water into the next sim, we didn't want to cause radioactive pollution. So the decision was made to try and disarm it. 

 So the cover of the circuitry was opened, and we carefully looked things over. Then we went ahead and cut a wire. The result was an alarm going off, and we barely had enough time to duck before there was an explosion of - confetti? It was a prank.

Rebel Wolf didn't say how he found out about the bomb, so it may have been an anonymous tip. So far, there have been no leads on who left the device. Stay tuned for further details.

The preceding was a fictional account for the purpose of entertainment.

Bixyl Shuftan
 

Vampire Bat Sighted at Montecito Bay

 *

Montecito Bay has seen some strange things in it's past from flying saucers to slime monsters. This Halloween season, something odd has been spotted flying around at night, a human-sized vampire bat.

The bat, which is humanoid with arms and legs along with two huge wings, has been seen several times at night or dusk, either flying through the air or standing on top of a building or in a dark area. About the only time it's been spotted inside a brightly lit building was when it was seen checking out the new arcade. 

There are no reports of the bat having harmed anyone, though a few eyewitnesses describe it as chasing away a robber.  There are also reports it's been flirting at a few of the women walking the streets at night. A local clinic has treated a couple women found with two fang marks on their necks and having mild blood loss. When asked how they got the marks, they just smiled. 

Talking to leading Montecito Bay citizen Moffett Mephit, he felt there was no reason for alarm as there were no reports of him hurting anyone. In fact, he thought it was cool it was around, commenting at one point he wouldn't mind being one himself, "Skunk teeth are cool, vampire teeth even cooler."  

So if you're walking the streets of Montecito Bay at night following a night at Studio 86 or the Roller Rink, or the new video arcade, keep your eyes out for a dark winged shape in the air. 

Note: the preceeding was a tale of fiction for this time of year. 

Bixyl Shuftan
 

Mutant Turkey Monster Prowls Montecito Bay

 
Gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble!
Gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble!
Gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble!

Thanksgiving has taken a strange and scary turn in the community of Montecito Bay. There have been sightings of a huge mutant beast resembling a four-legged turkey prowling the streets. While Montecito Bay has been the source of wild tales, this one has some pictures as evidence.

The beast shown in the pictures, and eyewitness descriptions, is a quadraped about twice the size of a normal human or anthro. Most of the creature is covered in turkey feathers, including a large plume of them in the back. Only the lower back legs, which resemble that of a feline, have any hairs. On the sides are two wings which are probably too small to small for it to really fly, probably. But it would be able to glide from someplace high to the ground. The head and neck are like those of a turkey, but much larger and stronger. The beak appears sharp and with the presumed size and strength of the creature is likely capable of tearing holes into someone or taking off limbs.

The creature has supposedly be sighted following people. And there are stories about a few people whom haven't been seen for a few days. Did they go ahead out of town for Thanksgiving, or did something else happen? Supposedly it followed someone into the city's Club 86, but left the people there alone. It is unknown what it would do if it encountered someone alone. But it has been seen consuming meat. Ironically enough, it seems to have a taste for turkey legs.

A number of Montecito Bay's streets have  dim to no lights. So residents in the city are advised to avoid traveling down these streets alone at night. And should you hear "gobble-gobble-gobble" sounds that don't seem right, RUN! You just might end up some mutant turkey's Thanksgiving dinner.

Gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble!
Gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble!
Gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble-gobble!

Stay tuned for further details.

Bixyl Shuftan

Note: The preceding article is for entertainment purposes, and residents aren't in actual danger.

Update on Montecito Bay

It's been about a month since the discount motel in the eastern part of Montecito Bay was seized by the mysterious Azucar entity under eminent domain laws. While there's no new information on who or what Azucar is, another property has come under their ownership. This time it's the Quality Used Cars lot on Palm Street. The cars are all gone and the building cleared out. There's not a great deal left besides the business sign and the "googly eyes" glued on it.

The car lot and the motel may be coming down soon. On another street, I saw a bulldozer and a excavator (or steam shovel/power shovel) parked next to one another. So it seems the razzing of one or both buildings can begin most any time.

For the most part, the seizure of the two places doesn't appear to have affected life in the community. Dropping by a club over the weekend, the people were talking about a furry wrestling league, not Azucar. Then again, used car salesmen don't exactly have the best of reputations. There was one place however that was making an slight extra effort to show others they were still in business. The S-Mart Express convenience store at the corner of Venetia Blvd. and Palm Street, which is near both the car lot and the motel, put up a sign, "I assure you we're open." The sign was hastily-painted words on a cloth. Although the place looked well-stocked, there was no clerk on duty when I stopped by. Maybe the worker was taking a bathroom break, but outside the store trash was piling up.

So will Montecito Bay soon be minus a motel and car lot? Will there soon be a "Rumble in the Bay" as furry wrestling comes to the community? Stay tuned for more information.

The preceding was written as a "fun article" for Montecito Bay

Bixyl Shuftan

Montecito Bay's Motel Closed, Taken By Mystery Owner

One of Montecito Bay's less glamorous but more eye-catching locations will soon be history. The city motel has been bought up and closed by a mysterious new owner. In front is a fence with a sign, saying the property had been seized, "Any person who attempts to tamper with this property will be prosecuted."

"Some weird entity is claiming parcels via eminent domain," Moff (MoffettMephit Resident) told me, "Nobody has ever heard of them!" I asked who they were, and he answered, "Azucar, Incorporated, apparently." He had tried looking up information online about them, and found nothing, "They must be brand new or something."

Stopping by the party at Studio 86 that night, which is just down the street south of the motel, people had various ideas what was going on. "Oh man, the hotel! I heard they found one of those mutants in there and the army came and closed the hotel down." "Mutants? Is that what's been messing around Montecito Bay?" "Yes, government projects. Maybe aliens. Or that SCP stuff the kids talk about on Redit." "I seen it with my own eyes, it looked like an alien, but much much bigger and stronger." "I was thinking of the church of the bleeding jackal skull. I have been watching too many 'You Don't Know Jack' commercials." "Azucar is Spanish for sugar! So maybe we're getting a Latin candy company!" "Afterwards the alien asked for sugar, in water."

In the northwestern part of town, the vicinity of the hotel hasn't seen the destruction of other parts of Montecito Bay such as last year's Groundhog Day incident, and the flying saucer crash weeks earlier. But there were a few "crop circles" in the vicinity. Before that, there was a weird statue not far away that some passersby described as compelling them to approach it. As for the motel itself, it's better days were years ago. While it's a cheap place to stay if one has almost no money, that one of the rooms is blocked off with "crime scene" tape is a frequent sight. There are rumors the place has freakishly huge spiders, but no doubt those tales are from combinations of liquor and  arachnophobia.

Stay tuned for more information.

Note: This is a fun article done at the request of Montecito Bay

Bixyl Shuftan

The End Of The Ice Cream At Luskwood

Since late August, the "Big Tree" at Luskwood had a dark dysutopian look, with toxic-looking water, grafitti, propaganda from a "Council" with leaflets proclaiming "rebellion" occasionally plastered on them, and a suspicious-looking ice-cream factory. There would be two more bulletins from the Council, one resembling L Ron Hubbard's Sea Organization advertisements, the other looking like Soviet propaganda.

On Saturday October 26 at 8PM SL time was a "Victory Day" party. As no one from the Newser was there, and there are no known pictures of the event, all that there is to go on what happened are the scenes of wreckage at the Big Tree, with clean water flowing this time, and eyewitness reports. There are multiple reports of a giant crab having wrecked the place, although one man claiming to be with the rebellion was saying he had a hand in the ice cream factory exploding, claiming that the substance was flammable. There was no sign of the crab, other than a much smaller one skittering around.

And the "Council?" Reports on what happened to them vary, from getting killed at the event to hospitalized. but it appears their rein over the oldest active community in Second Life is now over.

Note: There was no actual griefing. This was part of a plotline by the residents of Luskwood.

Bixyl Shuftan

LiaEx Freight and Shipping

Lia (Female Winslet) has been mentioned a few times in the Newser as a holiday decorator, a DJ, and the subject of a few cartoons. She recently contacted the Newser about her latest endeavor: the LiaEx Freight and Shipping Company. Deaflegacy met up with her at the shipping center in Janie's Landing, Avignon to interview her about the business. But Deaflegacy soon began seeing signs the company wasn't exactly a flawless model of efficiency.

Read Deaflegacy's article in Extra.

Montecito Bay UFO: The Military Responds

Montecito Bay has seen no shortage of weirdness. But it was about six months ago since it's weirdest time, when one of the town's buildings was hit by what looked like a UFO. Following when the strange craft was removed from the building but before it was taken away, the Newser managed to get a closer look. It's being taken away and the weird building that appeared in the wrecked structure's place overnight might have been the last word on the story. But this week, the Newser finally got an explanation from the US Military about the incident. So did they give a reason other than "swamp gas?"

Read the story in Extra.

Update on Montecito Bay: The Holographic Tower

When I took a close look at the site of the UFO crash in Montecito Bay late last month, I expected the flying saucer and what appeared to be either a mannequin or a body that had somehow avoided decay to be taken away soon. And checking the place last weekend, as expected they were gone. But what I didn't expect was finding the site completely repaired and with a new tower that looked like it might have been made by someone not of this Earth.

The top of the structure was surrounded by what looked like a red holographic globe. Besides the structure was some bizarre-looking sculpture and unearthly-looking plants that had glowing leaves. Just beneath the top was a circular band that went around the tower, full of the same kind of symbols that were in club schedule updates prior to the Groundhog Day incident.

There didn't seem to be an obvious way up. I did see a pad that looked a little like those transporter pads in science-fiction shows. A way to the top of the tower? I hesitated to find out.

Another thing I noticed, or rather didn't notice, were the "street circles" in the pattern of crop circles that had been on town intersections for months. They were now all gone.

So what does this all mean? I had a few words with town mayor Lem Aiko (LemonPledge Resident), who told me that "Official statement, it was swamp gas," and wasn't in a position to say more. But he did get me in touch with someone who was willing to speak under a condition of anonymity, saying that they had been told to say nothing by the Feds, "I know what I know, and you saw what you saw. It was indeed E.T. but this time they waged war on our city. I was there when they shot the city up in their UFO's. why would they do that if it wasn't an act of war? We still don't know why the UFO went down, or even why they were here in the first place." Someone with him thought the saucer probably went down due to pilot error, though it was a guess. A second person joked, "I think they were going for the irresistible hot dog cart and totally missed, but that's just me."

Of the strange tower that suddenly went up, "The crazy guy who I made mention of before says the building was a peace offering. He was right last time, I would believe him about that. I just hope they don't do it again. It cost the city millions. That is also why we are redeveloping the area that was bombed. the UFO attack so severely damaged the infrastructure in that part of the city, it's cheaper to completely scrap the design and move on to something new."

So is this the last we'll hear about flying saucers around here? With that strange tower, I hesitate to say. Even so, Montecito Bay never seems to be quiet for very long. Something strange usually happens just after things begin to settle in a routine. There's already reports of strange small creatures that speak with a lisp and have a craving for clams and other shellfish. And of course, there's what will be going up in place of the torn town buildings, whatever it is.

Montecity Bay, signing off, for now.

Note: There was no actual alien attack, just people having some fun.

Bixyl Shuftan

Update on Montecito Bay Cleanup

Montecito Bay experiences no shortage of weirdness. But lately things have been getting weird and destructive. A few weeks ago, the southwest corner of the city was wrecked. Thankfully no one was hurt, and cleanup soon started. A few weeks later, the city is just about ready to rebuild. But the cleanup has also exposed some possible evidence of a previous incident, the crash of a strange craft in December.

Read the story in Places.

Cleanup in Montecito Bay Begins

It was a week and a half ago on February 2 that Montecito Bay experienced a number of buildings in the southwest corner of it's sim getting demolished. As everyone was partying in their newly opened Magnum Opus Lounge at the time, no one saw who or what caused the damage, though there was a picture taken of what looked like a flying saucer in the distance. After some going through the rubble by investigators, the cleanup and rebuilding has begun.

The crop-circle patterns on the streets are still glowing. Curiously, a new one has appeared at the sim's entry point, also glowing. As with the original patterns, no one knows how it came to be.

Some strange red stains that look suspiciously like blood splatters remain up. Presumably, investigations are continuing on what it really is and how long it's been up. No investigation findings of either the massive wreckage or the mystery spots have been made public.Neither has a date been given on when the cleanup and repairs are expected to be finished. One date that has been given is for the notices for the club events to be printed in color again instead of the basic black and white pictures they've been for the past two weeks, on February 18. Montecito Bay official Emorald told the Newser that the print shop normally used to make the notices was among those wrecked on Groundhog Day. It wasn't stated though whether or not they'd continue to have the strange hieroglyphic-like symbols on them that had been appearing for weeks.

Addition: Talking to Moff later today, he remarked, "... the cleanup is continuing. We have the Crux Construction Company working 'round the clock to at least get the place cleaned up. It might not get rebuilt right away, because there's all kinds of issues involved with rezoning. But at least we won't look like a junkyard for too much longer."

Stay tuned for more details.

Bixyl Shuftan

Note: The preceding is a fun article based on goings-on by the people of Montecito Bay themselves and not the actions of any griefer.

Destruction in Montecito Bay: Number of Buildings Wrecked, Cause Not Yet Known

Groundhog Day, unlike the movie of the name, was anything but the same old thing to the residents of Montecito Bay. What started out as a celebration for the grand reopening of their Magnum Opus Lounge ended up as carnage with part of the sim reduced to rubble and wreckage. The cause is still a mystery as everyone in town was inside the newly restored venue partying.

"Uhh .... hi," Moff (MoffettMephit Resident) nervously grinned when I approached him just after the incident, "We uhh, had a thing." After some moments to compose himself, he stated, "I dunno what's going on. ...  We were at the opening. It was a good party. Fun, great music. And all of a sudden it was....we all thought the DJ was playing with us. 'Cuz we heard these, ya know how in the movies, they do laser fire? It sounded like that. Ya know, that 'pew, pew, pew.' And, of course, explosions and weird sounds. But we thought it was the DJ. But I noticed it was loud, but not coming from the speakers. So I snuck a peek outside and saw, well, this. So I told everyone to get out....and then well, here we are. Most of the folks went to go check on their homes."

The clues as to what happened are few. Moff did have a picture from Flying Pickle owner Sheba Metaluna (shown left) and showed it to me. "There were like 30 people out here. All taking pictures," he explained, "I imagine there's better than that one. And we didn't really see much, until we got out here. But by that time, I guess it was over." As of the writing of this article, no one else has posted a picture or shared it with the Newser.

One other clue was that the mystery "crop circle" patterns that appeared on the city streets a couple months ago have changed from their previous black color to glowing. " I mean, I can't explain it," Moff struggled for words, "The Galleria.... this glowing paint or whatever.... I mean it's not even glowing. It's giving off light....and now all this."

What could have caused all this? "This must have been a gas leak or something," Moff stated at one point, "Oh, I have to believe there's gonna be an investigation." The buildings might not be repaired that quickly, "I dunno what they'll let us do until that's done. Well, we'll get our police investigators on it. There's gotta be a reasonable explanation for all this. There were a lot of witnesses thought, at least after the fact."

Moff told the Newser he would inform us of any findings. Despite what looked like a flying saucer on Sheba's picture, Moff felt there had to be another explanation, even though a strange craft crashed in another of their buildings in mid-December, "I'll let you know what we find. ... I uhh....yeah, whatever we find out, but really, I mean....flying saucers?" He looked at the scenes of destruction, "I guess I better call the Crux Construction Company, again." Gin Ghostraven made some random comment, "At least no one found a gun laying around!"

Looking around, a number of buildings, all in the southwest corner of the sim, were damaged or destroyed, with piles of rubble and pools of water all over the place. While searching around, one of the walls had red stains that looked suspiciously like blood. There were no bodies or body parts nearby, though, at least not uncovered by rubble.

Stay tuned for further details.

Bixyl Shuftan

Addition: The following was posted on Montecito Bay's Discord by Becky Nosferatu:

"Ardor here, bringing you the Dragon-Eye scope today... As I've recently been hired by the council to do snaps of the city from high up- When I left my cave last night and flew to the island, I was stunned to find this disaster!  I've been told by City Officials that there was no casualties, unless you count Wasa Bay Sushi and the Sunset Diner a casualy. I do... what is it that all the younglings say today? 'Press F for respect?' I don't know what that manes, but... do it. On the upside of no living casualities, I must stress that you try to find an alternate rute to Avagora. I've used my Magic to edit the teleporters at the main landing. Use that instead. I'll keep you all posted, but... try not to panic."

Note: The preceding is a fun article based on goings-on by the people of Montecito Bay themselves and not the actions of any griefer.

Update On Montecito Bay's UFO

It's been a few weeks since the Newser reported on the mystery craft that had apparently crashed into the side of one of the buildings in Montecito Bay. So what's happened since then? A little.

Dropping by one event there, I asked what had come about since the crash. Someone commented, "I saw a ufo fly over my house, was a silent wingless black thing." Someone else joked, "I heard that gosh darned Loch Ness Monster was tryin' to get minimum wage at the donut shop on the shoreline again. Gosh darned Loch Ness Monsters."

Moff (MoffettMephit Resident) went into more detail, "So from what I've been told, it's all top secret as far as I can tell. But they don't know what it is. Current prevailing theories are, it's a giant radio controlled model that went horribly awry, or perhaps a top secret military thing. Now the believers are showing up and pushing some alien/UFO theory. You can tell by the angle it hit the building that whatever that thing is had some reasonable altitude."

There was one other matter, the posters of their club events becoming increasingly marked by weird symbols, as well as announcements in Discord. Moff told me, "About the posters, I dunno what's going on there. We create them, they are perfect, and the moment we upload them to the places they go, they somehow get corrupted. I'm wondering about sunspots. I mean, they're uploaded, so there's a data stream involved, so yeah, I guess sunspots could interfere. We're not really finding anything else. Same with the radio streams. They're clean, but then that weird stuff happens."

Of the mystery patterns with a resemblance to crop circles that have appeared in the sim's streets, Moff replied, "The streets department tried. None of their strippers will touch that paint, or whatever it is." Talking to him later, he was saying they would only go so far in trying to remove the symbols as they didn't seem to be doing any harm, "We're still trying to figure out which solvent to use to clean 'em up. So far, none have worked. We don't want to cause an environmental crisis. "

 "This has been a very bizarre year here," Moff told me, then smiled, "I can't wait til the new year!"

Later on, there was a conversation about a NASA craft in development that would stop meteors. Some wag, probably referring to the situation in the city, commented it would be useless against aliens.

What happens next? Time will tell.

Bixyl Shuftan

Mystery Craft In Montecito Bay

Just a week after the Newser reported on mysterious circles appearing on the streets of Montecito Bay, more strangeness has happened. Their Oceanside Galleria building has what looks like a flying saucer of some kind having crashed into the side.

If anyone needs to take Flamingo Ave. East, don't bother, traffic is officially halted from the start of Mission and ends at Venetia. We're not entirely sure, but... there's been a massive..... object that's crashed into the Galleria. We're doing our best to sort it, but please, to avoid delays, simply go all the way around to Bayside Drive or Palm Drive.

Group chatter didn't reveal much. Two people stated besides the police, the FBI has gotten involved. But no one would would say a thing about what the craft was, except perhaps the person in charge of the community's Twitter page.

Traffic has been halted from the start of Mission to Venetia, as authorities investigate a vehicle crash in the side of the Galleria. Expect delays. ⌿⍀⟒⌿⏃⍀⟒ ⊬⍜⎍⍀⌇⟒⌰⎐⟒⌇
#SecondLife #UFO #Second_Life

So somebody called this craft a "UFO." What the strange symbols in the tweet, or those in the tweet of this week's club events mean, or if they have anything to do with the UFO or the strange markings on the streets is unknown.

Although the US Military has tried to develop aircraft that resemble flying saucers, so far the prototypes are highly unstable more than a few feet in the air ... so far.

Stay tuned for more information.

Source: Popular Mechanics

Bixyl Shuftan

Mysterious Circles Appear on Montecito Bay's Streets

In October Montecito Bay dealt with a slime and maw monster scare. But while Halloween has ended, the weirdness in the community hasn't. Recently, there's been a rash of patterns appearing on the sim's city streets. While most are dismissing them as someone's prank, there have been some strange coincidences that have locals scratching their heads.

Read the story in Extra.

Montecito Bay Versus The Slime And Maw Monsters

Today, Montecito Bay celebrates it's first anniversary. But last week the community was facing down some weirdness, even weirder than what regularly happens here already. For some days before, there had been some sightings of puddles of slime. This day, that and more was confirmed by multiple eyewitnesses, notably slimy creatures that looked like the lounge chair from Hell.

Read the story in Extra.

"Sharknado" At The Happy Vixen

You wouldn't expect much to happen at a sleepy little beach club. But the Happy Vixen has seen it's share of excitement over time from Relay events, to Halloween parties, and more. Recently, the venue was the scene of a "Sharknado." It started off as a more-or-less regular party, minus some landwalker sharks joining the regulars. But the weather soon took a turn for the worse, and the little beach club experienced winds like never before.

Read about the event in SL Clubbin'